Sleeping and sleeping accessories

Almost all of that is universally good sleep hygiene, though some people, like myself, cannot sleep in a pitch black or completely silent room. It triggers the “something is wrong” feeling in me. I need a very dim light, like a very dim night light in the other room and a rain noise app playing quietly on my phone.

One thing I feel I should have mentioned, is I never sleep unless I’m on my stomach, one arm under the pillow, one above it, both over my head. This actually murders my lower back, but I’d trade sleep for back pain any day.

If we wanna go into the slightest bit more detail. Part of my issues sleeping in the modern era, after all the medications are out of my life (those were a huge comorbidity for a time) is that my mind is overactive when not stimulated. I see this basically any time I’m alone with my thoughts.

I see this when I boulder, I see this when float in the water in the sun, I see this when I jog, and yes I see this when I try to sleep.

My best success going to sleep generally has been actively during pillow talk, where I’m not alone with my thoughts.

I’ve fallen asleep to podcasts before because of this. Not asmr stuff though, that shit freaks me out.

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You should check out some meditation exercises and practice. Regular meditation can have a serious improvement in managing restlessness and anxiety.

Podcasts are something I’ve tried before, the issue being, at present I don’t have a convenient way to fall asleep with them, without either earbuds or filling the room with podcast noises. Perhaps some bluetooth speaker built into a pillowcase is worth looking into?

Many many years ago, in like, middle school I read a book on meditation. All I really remember now is something about picturing horses running around in a field. Maybe it merits a second look after not considering the subject for 15 years. I definitely wrote it off when I was in grade 8.

I bought a body pillow a few days ago hoping it would help with my shoulders. I’m not sure if I’m actually sleeping better but it’s so comfortable. I definitely get why they have a weird reputation though given that I’m basically spooning it every night.

Body pillows actually seem cool. I think the strange stigma mostly comes from having anthropomorphized fighter jets in their underwear printed on them. Or so I’ve been led to believe that is.


Yeah I figure as long as there isn’t an anime character on it I’m probably good. Although I do genuinely regret not getting this.

The only non-standard thing I have is a custom made sobakawa like pillow. It’s the size of a standard pillow, filled with buckwheat husks, with an elastic/stretchy fabric. It’s moldable enough that I can make it support anything I want and fit any sleep style I want to have it in, but the buckwheat husks give it enough mass and support that it doesn’t just stretch to nothingness.

I personally use it to perfectly support my neck and shoulders when I lay on my back. I’ve tried memory foam pillows and all the other shaped pillows, which are okay, but there’s always a small gap or a place where they press a bit more than I’d like. This pillow is just perfectly adjustable.

Buckwheat pillows are fantastic! I also agree 100% with what you said about foam pillows.

I like Japanese bedding in general. I like the morning ritual of putting my futon in the closet after I wake up. I like that the blanket has heft without being intentionally weighted. I love that my new apartment has new tatami, giving it that fresh tatami smell. The only thing I don’t like is how loud buckwheat pillows are.


This topic got me looking at things. I mean, I assume it’s my poor taking care of myself that is to blame for my sleeping problems, but I’ve tried a lot of things. My mattress IS 13 years old, so I went shopping. I checked out a lot of foam blah blah and the purple thing. Maybe I’m too used to what I have. I did like something slightly less firm than what I own. I used to love rigid, I’m a back sleeper mostly, but now since I have noticed slight back problems I want something that gives a little?

One thing I don’t like is “adjustable” blah. I don’t want a remote for my bed. I just want to sleep in it. People make recliners out of their beds, and for me those are entirely separate places.

I actually sleep pretty well if I follow Rym’s schedule and actually exercise in some way or form that day. It’s just been a while since I’ve done that and I try to solve other problems first. I did add a humidifier when it was really dry in winter, and that helped for that environment. I also have a fan for ambient noise/cooling/keeping bugs off.

Anyway, replacing mattress Wednesday and moving to a queen (had one once, then a full). I bought it from the same store as my last one almost as a courtesy. Went 2 steps less firm… we’ll see if I regret that.

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Pretty much everyone I know has a full or queen mattress, but I could probably chop 6" off the side of my twin without noticing. It just seems like so much space (if you’re the only one using the bed).

Okay, so what is the superior mattress?

My personal considerations are: Casper, Leesa and Purple.

Winkbeds is great highly recommended.

Just got a Purple and it was a vast improvement. They feel a little funky though so definitely try before you buy.

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I orderd a Big Fig mattress and box set and have to say its been pretty great and firm for anyone who’s over 250 lbs

Would it work without the boxspring? I have a platform bed so don’t need them.

Neito, They basically include it at no extra markup from the matress price, but you can go without and save a 100 on the mattress.