AITA for not wanting to play Among Us anymore with my MMO guild?

Hey all,

Making this post to vent some steam, but also to get some opinions from smart people and experienced gamers, so here goes.

Essentially, my MMO guild has been playing Among Us every Friday night for the last couple of months. Typically, we all drink and game and it’s a silly mess. Last week, one of the older members and officers unofficially quit playing with everyone because some really dumb stuff was happening and he just decided the stress wasn’t worth it. Okay, you do you.

This week I was all out of beer when we played and, when playing the game, noticed a lot of habits that is literally making the game “unplayable” or at the very least un-enjoyable for me. I guess I’m wondering if these are actual issues that’s going to ruin the event or if I’m just being a nit-picky AH. These issues include:

  1. People being AFK for most of the game to eat dinner or cook dinner (like, why are you even playing? Just join when you can)

  2. Three people, including my wife and myself, are always fingered as being “sus” every round we survive EVEN when we have been verified by doing visual tasks.On an interesting side note to compliment this habit, two people are never pointed at as being the imposters unless they are seen doing a kill, but are incredibly skilled at taking out the crew to the point where they can get 4-5 crew dead before the first body is even found.

  3. If someone dies, they put their phone down and do something else and refuse to finish tasks. This obviously means the only viable path to a crew win is by voting out the imposters. Recently, folks have switched to taking eject confirmations off the game. I think that should normally be a good thing, but it is strongly favoring imposters when they know to not kill the people that are always blamed for being “sus” (Point 1).

  4. No one wants to formulate a plan to survive or out the imposters. Twice last night we had plans to stay grouped and verify crew members with visual tasks. Immediately after the first person verifies their visual task, the whole group broke the plan and did not visual verify the other survivors to pinpoint who the imposters were. And there are still two people who are arguing that visual tasks give the crew an unfair advantage.

That’s pretty much it. I’ll add that last night we played I think 15 games in the course of about 2 hours, and the crew won once by voting out both imposters because they both killed in plain sight. Multiple times I brought up in voice chat the above issues and was immediately dismissed by everyone. I even tried to argue that this game isn’t staying fun now because the crew has only one way to win and can’t work together as a team, which is the biggest strength the crew has.

Is this a nothing-burger, or am I justified in not wanting to play anymore unless I’m drinking and don’t care about playing the game like everyone else seems to be?

Nah, you’re not being an asshole. There’s no obligation to play anything with anyone you don’t want to. The point is to have fun, and if you’re not having fun, you don’t have to push yourself to do it anyway.


Yeah, I guess. I dunno. I feel like my wife is making me feel guilty wanting to dip out. I enjoy doing that with them when it’s just killing time and we’re drinking, but I don’t like people getting upset that I’m “being too quite” or “not defending myself”. I prefer not to say much anyways cause I hate attention, but the last game last night came down to someone who is very skilled at being the imposter and a guy quieter than me and myself and I found one of the bodies and reported it and the conversation went:

Me: “Okay, I found X’s body, so it’s clearly Summy.”

Summy: “Oh? And why is that?”

Me: “Because Gary and I have been verified with visual tasks.”

Gary: “I never saw your visual task.”

Me: “We just went over this last meeting. How is it my fault you didn’t do what we all agreed we would do?”

Summy: “Sounds pretty sus.”

I get voted out, crew loses, and then everyone gets back on mic to tell me I don’t defend myself and yell about how I “roll over” because I guess I don’t get angry enough? Like, I don’t understand.

My 2c. Just bail. That may be because I’m a pro at just bailing but that’s what I’d do.

If you’re not going to do that, then the next tac is just being like, “ya’ll have to learn how I sound when I’m telling the truth. If you don’t have great powers of perception, soft spoken folks always seem like they’re rolling over. git gud”

That’s something you’ll have to discuss with your wife, mate, not us. We don’t really know her, what she might have said, or any of that.

I’m serious, you don’t have to play a game where you’re not having fun in that situation. I have friends I’ve had for, god, more than ten years at this point, where I don’t really play games with them because they stress me the fuck out, or get too angry, or so on. We all have people we don’t want to do certain things with because our styles ain’t compatible, it’s nothing to feel guilt over. You’re not stopping them playing the game, you’re not impeding on their fun in any way - you do not owe them your presence, when it’s of detriment to you.

You don’t even have to bail forever, for all games, just when they’re playing among us and you’re not drinking, or you just don’t feel like it. Cutting back without cutting it out entirely is perfectly reasonable and viable.


Hidden role games are notorious for unexpected bullying and subconscious griefing. The solution really is to dip, just be completely upfront and say “I don’t enjoy this game with you, I’m not playing”.


I’m going to assume your perspective on the situation is accurate, because I have seen many such situations before. What you are experiencing is a very common mismatch between players with regards to how much they care about the game, and also a little bit of air hockey problem.

It seems like some people care more or less about winning, and some players even have fluctuating levels of care while the game is going on. This results in a combination of griefing and sharp play in the same game. Players who don’t care ruining the experience for those who do. Other players who care about winning so much they take advantage and win, but don’t even care that it’s a hollow victory.

This applies to literally any multiplayer game, and not just Among Us. If you are actually going to put care and effort into playing the game and trying to win, you need to play with 100% other players who feel the same. Otherwise, you’re going to have a bad time.

Just honestly and nicely explain to the other players that you are trying to play the game somewhat seriously, and because they aren’t also putting in the effort to play well, that kinda makes it not fun. Ask them if they are willing to focus and try to take the game a little more seriously. If they don’t want to, then all you can do is decide whether to continue playing that game with those people.

You have the freedom to choose what you do. Maybe you’ll feel like it sometimes, maybe no times. Maybe same game different people. Maybe different game, same people. Your life is short. You are better off spending your time trying something new than trying something again that wasn’t good the first time around.


Hey, thanks for the input all. I appreciate the feedback. I think I might sit out a week or two until I feel like I can narrow down a focus on being able to self-assess my frustration level with their play style. It may also not be a terrible thing to maybe sit out a round or two while playing if I just need a moment. I appreciate the reminders that a big part of that may just be different goals. Y’all rock.

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I enjoy watching certain among us streamers, but they have strong house rules centered on “this game should be fun” and “there’s more to fun than winning”.

so, for example, in order for the imposter experience to be similarly enjoyable to the crew experience, they have anything that can hard clear turned off – taskbar updates on meeting, no visual tasks, no medbay scan cancels. Another example, if imposters win, they discourage accusations of “throwing” and other emotional manipulation/bullying.

And yet, even within that group, inevitably someone gets salty or rude, or there’s fairly apparent bias in who attracts suspicion more than others (apparent at least to the focus of that bias).

Frankly, as someone who is AFAB who plays a lot of games, that’s unfortunately how the cookie often crumbles. There is a non-insignificant percentage of people who use games to amend their insecurities. It’s a major reason why I avoid playing games (especially social-political ones) with anyone who demonstrates an inability to assess and manage their internalized biases, or understand, communicate, and negotiate their personal gaming preferences & goals. It also explains my decision to gravitate towards mostly mechanical 2p games.

This is all to say that multiplayer games are a lot like life: you’re going to have a better time with people who communicate, share, and establish similar expectations. There’s nothing wrong with removing yourself from an interaction that isn’t serving you. That’s just establishing healthy boundaries.


Everytime I play Among Us with my gamer friends who are barely into boardgames I am reminded of every better boardgame with hidden roles that we could/should be playing instead. I’ve experienced everything you’ve described in public and private games and I’m just over it barring major mechanics updates to make it less meta-gamey.